


Taking Things in Hand

by monimala



Category: General Hospital
Genre: F/M, Gap Filler
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 14:01:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13249722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/monimala/pseuds/monimala
Summary: Set during December of 2017. Living with Anna as they close in on Cassandra's opiate skullduggery is taking its toll on Finn, and there's only one way to work off his frustration.





	Taking Things in Hand

He hasn’t masturbated in a very long time. At first it felt too disrespectful. To want pleasure, to chase it, without Reiko was wrong somehow. And how could he seek out the little death when he was facing the big one? So, for months, he fought his morning erection with the cold slap of the shower. He thought of the periodic table and cadavers in the path lab at medical school whenever Hayden left him aching and frustrated. And then they were together and, well, she was more than happy to do the work for him...her nimble fingers and smart mouth were far more expert at the task, taking him places he never knew existed. After...after she left, the shower became his refuge again. The shower. Then _Anna’s_ shower. Where no matter how cold the taps go, he’s surrounded by heat and life and laughter. So he’s doing that thing that he never thought he’d do again. Touching himself. Slicking his fist with lube or lotion and fucking into his own tight grip. Trying to take the edge off of a lust so sharp that it cuts.

Because living with Anna is a lot. No, it’s too much. From her obsession with Jane Austen to her off-key singing when she’s knocking around the kitchen — what did the Stones ever do to deserve such treatment? — to her constant need to tell him what to do...Finn is surrounded by this woman. He finds strands of her long, dark hair on his clothes when he’s stripping for bed. He instinctively makes her tea in the morning while he’s fixing his coffee. He goes still when he hears her footsteps in the hallway, and he feels the smile on his face before he even registers that he’s happy. _Happy_. In her house with her and her things. With the memory of her taste still on his lips.

“ _You think I want to be with you?”_

“ _Don’t you?”_

He wants her so badly that it’s shaken him. Up is down, blue is green, his entire worldview is askew. So he wraps his hand around his dick and tries to pull the desire out of him. Maybe if he does it enough, he can drain himself of craving her — that’s what the rationale is, but it doesn’t work. Because he still wakes up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat and blinking away dreams of making love to her. His subconscious doesn’t even have the decency to make it fast and dirty fucking against her living room wall. No, he has these beautiful candlelit visions of grinning as he makes his way down her body and settles in between her thighs. He has bright fantasies of how she’ll sound when she comes, and of her calling him “Hamilton” in that moment even though he doesn’t answer to it. Because Anna’s never respected his boundaries, has she? She’s broken through every barrier, forced her way over his walls...made herself at home in his heart.

He knows he’s going to give in. Someday soon, he’s going to reach for her again. He’s going to kiss her and hold her and swallow her half-assed protestations as she slips her arms around his neck. They’re going to stumble to the couch or her bed. And they’re going to finish what they started. Maybe New Year’s. Maybe Valentine’s Day. He’ll go from touching himself in the dark to exploring all of Anna Devane with the lights on.

It doesn’t feel disrespectful to want pleasure, to chase it, anymore. It just feels like falling in love.

 

 

-end-

 

January 2, 2018

 


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